The Secret Cottage
by Fantony
Summary: When Draco's parents are killed by Voldemort, Dumbledore sends both him and Harry to a secret place, to keep them safe from the Dark Lord. What happens when Harry discovers the blonde's darkest secret? Slash. HPDM. Drarry. Harry's POV. Hurt D./Protective H. Chapter 8 rated M.
1. Chapter 1

_**Plot:**__ When Draco's parents are killed by Voldemort, Dumbledore sends both him and Harry to a secret place, to keep them safe from the Dark Lord. What happens when Harry discovers the blonde's darkest secret? Slash. Drarry. Harry's POV. Hurt Draco/Protective Harry. _

_**Note:**__ This is my first drarry, so don't expect too much! :D_

_**Please keep in mind that I'm French, hence the English mistakes**__! ;) _

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><p><strong>THE SECRET COTTAGE.<strong>

**CHAPTER 1.**

I put the picture of Hermione and Ron back on my bedside table and something tightens in my throat. I should be spending the summer holidays with them. At the Burrow. But I'm stuck here with Malfoy instead. Until next term. And that's probably going to be the longest summer of my life.

Dumbledore's idea...

Against all odds, Voldemort killed Lucius and Narcissa Malfoy nearly three weeks ago. I don't know why, Dumbledore wouldn't say much about it. All I know is Draco managed to escape through a portkey his parents had placed in the family house. Anyway, Voldemort now wants him dead and in order to keep him safe from the Dark Lord, Dumbledore decided to send him to a secret place for the summer. Except he didn't want him to be alone...

Oh, I wouldn't complain about the place. It could have been a lot worse. We could have been locked in some dungeon somewhere. Instead, we are staying at a small but cosy cottage lost in the open countryside and surrounded by strong protective spells. I have no idea where we are exactly. Wales? Cornwall? Maybe we're not even in England. Dumbledore wouldn't give any indication. He believes that if Voldemort enters my mind once again, it is safer if I don't know where we are, that'd make things more difficult for him to find us.

Anyway, it's been two weeks now and I'm so bored, I'm starting to think I'd rather be at the Dursley's. Sure, they spent their time yelling at me, but at least, they _did_ talk to me.

Malfoy doesn't say a word. He spends most of his time in his bedroom. Sometimes in the garden, against that old oak tree that must be older than Dumbledore himself.

Not that he hadn't warned me. We were here for less than two minutes when he told me _"Don't touch any of my things. Don't even talk to me. Just pretend I don't exist and I'll do the same. Is that clear, Potter?"_

Well, at least, that set the tone.

So I spend my days wondering what the others are doing, wondering if everyone's ok as we're completely cut off from the outside world. I can't write to Ron and Hermione, nor can I receive owls or anything. We're not even allowed to do magic.

A soft sound takes me out of my torpor. I put my ear to the wall that separates me from his bedroom. Choked sobs. He is crying. Again. Same thing every night since we arrived here. I can't blame him. We now have more in common than I would ever have imagined.

The sobs escalate. They're stronger than usual and I just can't stand them anymore.

I slip out of my bed and get out of my room.

I hesitantly knock on his door. No reply. Never mind, I don't need his permission.

"Fuck off, Potter!" he yells as I enter his room.

I expected no less from him.

"You do know how to make people feel welcomed, don't you?" I scoff.

"What part of fuck off' you don't understand?" He snaps.

He's lucky I'm a stubborn git.

"Look, you can call me all names if you want, I don't give a fuck. I just won't let you cry alone one more night. Did you think I didn't hear you every single night?"

"I wasn't crying!" He protests in a cracked voice.

I walk toward the bed, turn the bedside lamp on and look at him, sitting huddled on his bed. I lift his chin up. His eyes are red and puffy, and his cheeks are wet.

"No, sure," I say softly.

He frowns and slaps my hand away.

"So what? It's none of your business! Just leave me alone, Potter!" He screams, quickly wiping his tears away with the sleeve of his dark green pyjamas.

He should know by now that I rarely do what I am told to.

"I think I can understand, you know..." I tell him as I sit on his bed.

"No, you can't!" He shouts. "You still wore nappies when yours died! What do you _really_ remember about them, huh? And I'm not talking about the things people have told you about!"

I clench my fists and I refrain from punching him in the face.

"Don't want to be helped? Fine! But just quit whining so that I can sleep in peace!"

I am boiling with anger, but the thing is I don't know whether I am mad at him because he annoys the hell out of me, or because he told the truth to my face and it hurts so much.

"Potter!" I hear him call as I put my hand on the door knob.

I turn around.

"Stay..." he whispers, avoiding my eyes, "please..."

His voice is nearly pleading, and he looks so lost and miserable that I decide to put my hard feelings aside. I let out a sigh and sit back on the edge of the bed.

He keeps staring at his feet, and I observe him. The white light of the lamp makes his skin look even paler. His blonde hair is tousled and his bangs, wet from perspiration, cling to his forehead. I have to fight the urge to push them away from his ice-blue eyes.

"The nightmares," he finally speaks, "do they ever stop?"

I open my mouth, ready to lie because I don't really want him to feel worse, but he deserves the truth, after all. I shake my head with compassion.

"No... Not really..."

He nods and silence falls again.

All I can hear is his breath, slow and deep, and it somehow relaxes me. My eyelids become heavier and heavier, and soon, I can't keep my eyes open anymore...

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><p><em><strong>Thanks for reading! Reviews are welcome!<strong>_** :) **

**Published on August.16 2011**


	2. Chapter 2

_**Plot:**__ When Draco's parents are killed by Voldemort, Dumbledore sends both him and Harry to a secret place, to keep them safe from the Dark Lord. What happens when Harry discovers the blonde's darkest secret? Slash. Drarry. Harry's POV. Hurt Draco/Protective Harry. _

_**Note:**__ Well, I usually don't update that fast, too busy with work, my son, my husband and all, but I'm on holidays this week, sooooo... :p _

_**Please keep in mind that I'm French, hence the English mistakes**__! ;) _

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><p><strong>CHAPTER 2. <strong>

One more week has passed by, and we still hardly talk to each other.

I thought the event of the other night would have brought us together, but it didn't. He was as quiet as the tomb the following day. However, he knocked at my door in the middle of the following night and, putting his pride aside, he simply asked if he could sleep in my bed. And he did so every single night that followed.

Night makes him more vulnerable. The nightmares got worse, and he just can't stand being left alone in the dark anymore. I know how it feels...

Now he doesn't even knock, he just joins me in silence.

And when I wake up in the morning, I usually find him curled up against me. He looks so peaceful I wouldn't want to wake him up. So I cautiously slip out of the bed, and let him sleep quietly.

I haven't told him about that, he would freak out. Well, I freaked out too the first time I woke up with his head laying on my chest and his hand clutching my shirt. But come to think of it, it's not a big deal. I guess he's only looking for some comforting in his sleep and with me being the only human being around, well...

Anyway, I overslept today, had some nightmares I don't want to remember, and he's not in bed anymore. I get out of the room and look around me, he's nowhere to be seen. He must already be reading in the garden...

Yawning, I make my way to the bathroom and open the door only to find him wearing nothing but his underwear.

"Hey! Can't you knock on the door, Potter!" He shrieks, grabbing a huge green towel and trying to cover the best of him with it.

I would have a go at him for not locking his door if something hadn't caught my attention. Something he's actually trying to hide from me with this towel.

"What are you staring at? My wonderful muscular body?" He asks ironically, but the embarrassed look on his face shows that he knows what I have seen.

I slowly remove the towel from him. He doesn't put up resistance, but he breathes faster and faster, and I gasp.

His chest, his arms, his legs... his whole body is covered with scars. Some look like burns, others like deep cuts, some look old, others more recent... There are so many of them I wonder how he's still alive. I stare at them with horror and I'm suddenly mad at whoever did this to him.

"What?" He snaps, taking the towel back. "You're jealous because I have more scars than you? Don't worry, Potter, I won't steal the show, _my_ scars won't make me famous..."

"Stop saying bullshit, Malfoy! What the hell happened to you?"

"Get the hell out of here! I'd like to shave and get dressed!" he yells, ignoring my question.

"Not until you tell me what happened to you!"

"Merlin, Potter! I've never seen someone as stubborn as you!" He says in a fake detached tone, grabbing his shaving cream.

"Malfoy, tell me now!"

"Fuck you, Potter! Can't you mind your bloody business, for once? Why do you always interfere in –"

I don't let him finish his sentence and pin him against the wall.

"WHO. DID. THAT. TO. YOU?"

"Let go of me!" He pleads, with both fear and anger in his eyes.

"WHO. DID. THAT. TO. YOU?" I repeat slowly.

"Bloody hell, Potter, let me go!" He exclaims, trying to escape but I tighten my grip on his shoulders.

Before I can reply, something hits my cheek so violently I lose my balance and fall on my butt, seeing stars.

When I open my eyes, everything's blurry and I realise I've lost my glasses.

"Look, I'm sorry, Potter... I..."

He sounds sincere and I don't even have it in me to be mad at him. Not after what I've seen...

"It's okay," I say, "I shouldn't have insisted like that..."

I hear him run water in the sink and then he kneels down in front of me. I don't see his face clearly, I only distinguish a light shade, but he's so close I can feel his breath against my lips, and my heart skips a beat.

Suddenly, something cold on my lips. A cotton ball soaked with water I guess.

"Your mouth... It's bleeding..." he explains, swabbing my lips.

I let out a breath I hadn't been aware I was holding.

"Can you give me my glasses?" I ask him to focus on something else.

"Sure! They're... Shit!"

"What?"

"They're broken!"

"The lenses?"

"No... The frames... No worries... I'll get my wand and fix them," he announces, standing up.

"No! Don't you remember what Dumbledore said? _No magic unless your life is in danger_..." I remind him.

"Yeah, right... You wait here!" He orders, offering his hand to help me get back on my feet.

"Here you are," he says when he returns and puts my glasses back on my nose.

I look at my reflection in the mirror. My left cheekbone is swollen and red, already turning blue, there is blood on the corner of my mouth, and my glasses are taped together with brown packaging scotch-tape.

"Couldn't you use transparent Spello-tape?" I scoff.

"Only had this one... It's not like I use Spello-tape often you know!"

"Never mind, it makes me look even sexier than usual!" I say ironically.

We burst into laughing and I realise that's the first time we laugh since we arrived here. That's actually the first time we laugh together and not at each other's expense, and it somehow feels... good...

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><p><em><strong>Thanks for reading, and many thanks for the fav', the alerts and the encouraging reviews! They mean a lot to me! :) <strong>_

**Published on August.17 2011**


	3. Chapter 3

_**Plot:**__ When Draco's parents are killed by Voldemort, Dumbledore sends both him and Harry to a secret place, to keep them safe from the Dark Lord. What happens when Harry discovers the blonde's darkest secret? Slash. Drarry. Harry's POV. Hurt Draco/Protective Harry. _

_**Note:**__ Well, I usually don't update that fast, too busy with work, my son, my husband and all, but I'm on holidays this week, sooooo... :p _

_**Please keep in mind that I'm French, hence the English mistakes**__! ;) _

* * *

><p><strong>CHAPTER 3.<strong>

Despite what happened this morning, Malfoy has spent most of the day reading under the oak tree again. I don't give up hope of him opening himself to me though. I take a deep breath and walk towards him. He doesn't even look at me as I sit on the tyre swing next to him. Several minutes pass by and he keeps on ignoring me.

"What are you reading?" I finally ask, just to break that heavy silence.

"_The Three Musketeers_," he replies, without tearing his gaze from the book.

"That's a muggle book," I remark, surprised.

"Like I didn't know," he scoffs, making a face.

"Now I'm starting to be really worried about you, Malfoy!"

He sighs and closes his book.

"That was my mother's. My aunt introduced her to muggle literature when they were kids and –"

"Bellatrix?" I cut him off.

He rolls his eyes.

"No, Andromeda. _(1)_ Always had a thing for muggles. Well, I guess that's why she married a mudblood." His nose wrinkles in disgust at this word and I feel relieved somehow. "Anyway, as Mother secretly enjoyed muggle literature, Andromeda gave her some of her books when she was disowned by the Black family. Mother had kept them since. Of course, she never told Father about it, he would have destroyed them and been really disappointed in her. She read those books to me when I was a kid, but when I attended Hogwarts, I told her I didn't want to hear about them ever again. But I don't know... now I feel like... you know..."

Those books are a remaining link to his mother...

I nod and he gets back to reading. The late afternoon sun shining through the leaves of the tree casts its flickering light on him and plays beautifully on the porcelain skin of his face. I'd never realised he was that handsome...

"Quit staring Potter, or I'll start to think you fancy me!" He smirks, taking me out of my torpor.

"Wha? No... Whatever! I wasn't... I... " I protest.

_Yes, I was. _

"You're blushing!"

"No, I'm not!" _Yes, I am. "_Fuck off, Malfoy!"

Dammit, what's wrong with me?

He laughs but his grin suddenly fades away and a sadness falls across his face.

"You okay?" I enquire, trying to hide my concern.

"The scars..." he says hesitantly, "it's the Death Eaters..."

I raise an eyebrow in an inquisitive way.

"Well, you wondered who did that to me. The Death Eaters did..." He explains in a barely audible voice.

"Why?" is the only word I manage to form.

He shrugs and looks away.

"Your father was one of them, so why would they hurt you? That doesn't make sense!"

"I don't know... It all started a year ago, on my fifteenth birthday... They told me I was old enough to join their Friday night meetings and –"

"Friday night? How could you leave Hogwarts without being noticed?"

"That, I can't tell you, Potter... Anyway, they started torturing me, every damn Friday, saying it was some kind of rite of passage... You bet! They just enjoy hurting people... They used Dark spells on me... Very dark spells... Cruciatus curse, and some spells I'd never heard of like Sectumsempra _(2)_ that would slash me like an invisible sword, again, and again, but that's not all... There also was..." he bits his lower lip, "sexual abuse..."

I gasp in horror. I just can't imagine all the pain he went through.

"But why did you keep going to these meetings?"

"They threatened me... told me that if I didn't come, they would end me..."

"But... I don't understand... How could your parents let that happen to you?" I ask, indignantly.

"Do you think they had a choice?"

"You were their only child! They loved you to bits! Why didn't they try to stop it?"

"They tried! Have you ever wondered why the Dark Lord has killed them?" He yells. "They tried their best to heal me every week, Mother kept crying and telling Father that they had to put an end to this, despite the threats... And you know what happened when they finally rebelled..."

My mouth drops open. It's all cristal clear now... And I hate the Death Eathers even more than I did. And I hate myself because I never tried to understand Malfoy. Never tried to know him better. I was blinded by my loathing.

"I'm so sorry..." I murmur.

"Oh, come on! I don't need your pity, Potter!"

"I'll never let them touch you again! I promise!" I tell him, ignoring his comment.

"Ah... Yeah... Bloody saviour Potter..." he sneers, "the boy who's supposed to kill Voldemort and save the World... and who would fight a whole bunch of Death Eaters on his own for me, even though we've always despised each other." He laughs bitterly. "No wonder you've been sorted into fucking Gryffindor."

"I don't care that you've always hated me, all I know is I won't let anyone hurt you again, you've already suffered enough."

"Getting all protective and lovey-dovey, Potter? How touching! But I don't need you. I don't need anyone."

"You're wrong..."

"No, I'm perfectly fine by myself."

"So fine you don't even manage to stay alone at night... And spare me that disdainful glare, I'm not saying that in a mocking way. Not at all. You've been through a lot lately. Had I been in your shoes I don't think I would have handled it that well, I'm even pretty sure I wouldn't have. But there's no need to wear a mask with me, Draco."

"Shut the hell up, Potter! You're talking nonsense!" he shouts.

"Are you sure?"

He frowns and looks on the verge of tears. Without thinking, I get up and hug him.

"What the hell are you doing, Potter? Leave me alone!" He shrieks, pounding his fists against my chest and trying to push me away.

"No, I won't," I say flatly, holding him even tighter.

Suddenly, he stops struggling, buries his head in my neck and breaks down and cries.

"Shhh... it's gonna be alright..." I whisper in his ear, absently running my fingers in his silky hair.

It's a lie. It's not gonna be alright. His pain won't go away. Never. But I swear I'll do anything to help him ease his misery...

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><p><em><strong>Thanks for reading, and many thanks for the fav', the alerts and the encouraging reviews! They mean a lot to me! :) <strong>_

**Published on August.20 2011**

_(1) For those who wouldn't remember, Andromeda is Bellatrix and Narcissa's sister, and Nymphadora Tonks' mother. _

_(2) I'm not sure that Snape has ever told the Death Eaters about that spell, but let's pretend he did, huh? ;) My story is some kind of AU anyway, as it doesn't follow the books' plot. _


	4. Chapter 4

_**Plot:**__ When Draco's parents are killed by Voldemort, Dumbledore sends both him and Harry to a secret place, to keep them safe from the Dark Lord. What happens when Harry discovers the blonde's darkest secret? Slash. Drarry. Harry's POV. Hurt Draco/Protective Harry. _

_**Note:**__ Well, I usually don't update that fast, too busy with work, my son, my husband and all, but I'm on holidays this week, sooooo... :p _

_**Please keep in mind that I'm French, hence the English mistakes**__! ;) _

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><p><strong>CHAPTER 4.<strong>

I am sitting against the old oak tree, listening to the sweet melody of the rain hitting the leaves. I love rain. The sound. The smell. I love feeling the water seep my shirt and getting through my skin. I could spend hours sitting in the rain, eyes closed.

This brings back memories from my time at the Dursley's. Memories of that summer afternoon I managed to escape from the house for the first time. I couldn't be more than five, but I remember it as if it were yesterday. I ran, and ran. And ended in a park where I spent the whole afternoon sitting against a tree and listening to the rain, just like now. And when I came back home in the evening, soaked to the bone, the Dursleys were furious. Uncle Vernon locked me in my cupboard with just a small bottle of water and no food until the following evening. I was cold, and hungry. But I had no regrets. I had tasted freedom for the first time, and it was priceless...

"Hey, Potter!"

I was so lost in my thoughts I haven't heard Malfoy walking toward me.

"You do know it's raining, right?"

I make a funny face.

"Malfoy and his legendary sense of sarcasm," I growl. "A simple _Good morning, Harry_ would have done the trick, you know?"

He grins and sits by my side.

"Here," he says, grabbing my hand and placing a small black packet inside it. "For you."

"For me?"

He rolls his eyes.

"No, for Trelawney. Always thought she was a babe."

"What for?" I ask, ignoring his sarcastic comment.

"It's your birthday, idiot! Don't tell me you had forgotten!"

I had. I've kinda lost all sense of time since we arrived here, anyway.

"How come you know it's today?"

"Merlin, Potter! Don't want you to get more big-headed than you already are, but who in the wizarding world doesn't know your birthday is on july.31st?"

I shrug and stare at the small packet in the hollow of my hand, hesitating. It feels so weird getting a present from a long time enemy. Even though that word doesn't seem appropriate anymore.

"What are you waiting for? The rain will ruin my hair if I stay here for too long!"

"Alright, alright!" I say with a laugh.

I unwrap the present cautiously. It's a necklace with an emerald-eyed silver snake pendant. I swear I've already seen it around his neck.

"No... Draco... I can't..." I protest, holding the necklace to hand it back to him.

He looks so upset that I already regret my words.

"Why? Does it look too Slytherin for you?" he spits.

I shake my head.

"No! Don't get me wrong! I mean... It's a very beautiful necklace, I love it, really! But it looks ancient, I bet it's been running in your family for ages, and you must be very attached to it..."

"True. It was my great-grand-father's and it's my most precious possession. Along with my wand, that's it."

"Then why do you give it to-"

"Oh, shut up, Potter! Just take it, for fuck's sake!"

I nod and put the necklace around my neck.

"Looks better on you. It matches your eyes," he says, looking pleased.

I smile at him and have to fight the urge to hug him.

"Thanks!"

"Don't mention it! You'll just have to remember this when - ooooouch!" he suddenly screams and I watch him clutch his left forearm and grimace in pain.

"Draco, what's wrong?" I ask, all worried.

"Probably made an awkward move that will have brought back an old injury..." He mutters through clenched teeth.

He's lying. His face is paler than usual, he is tensed and he's avoiding my eyes.

"Show me your arm," I say firmly.

"Nah, it's ok. It's already less painful."

I grab his arm and slowly roll up his left sleeve to reveal a symbol on his inner forearm. A skull with a snake protruding from its mouth. Burning black.

That's what I feared. He's one of them.

"Voldemort's calling his Death Eaters and you're supposed to apparate by his side, right?"

He lowers his eyes and nods.

"And what happens if you don't?"

"No idea, but I'd rather not think about it..."

I'd rather not think about it either. He looks terrified and I won't tell him that I know Voldemort is looking for us. And he is furious. I saw him in my dreams yesterday, but just tried to chase the thought away...

I stare blankly at his Dark Mark.

"I know what you're thinking..." he says, still clutching his burning forearm.

I look at him and raise an eyebrow. I guess he is talking about him being a Death Eater.

"And what am I thinking?"

He shrugs and scoffs.

"That I'm a complete prat. That I'm even worse than you thought. And I can't blame you. I would think the same."

He looks so sad and scared, and fragile right now that I almost miss his old self. The old Malfoy, all arrogant, rude and confident, and who would have never thought low of himself.

"No," I speak softly, "I don't think you're a complete prat, Draco. I just think you've been involved in a war you were not willing to fight."

"You're wrong," he says coldly. "I wanted to be a Death Eater. I almost begged to become one. And you know why? Because I wanted you dead."

Something tightens in my throat and I have to fight back the tears. I knew he hated me, but I didn't know he wished me dead. And the truth is that I'm not even angry. I'm just... sad...

"You hated me that much?"

He lets out a long sigh.

"You're wrong again, Potter. I've never hated you."

My eyes widen with surprise.

"Remember... I just wanted to be your friend, and you rejected me."

"You'd made fun of Hagrid. And Ron. And muggle-borns."

"Yeah, well..."

Another sigh.

"And what about all those disdainful looks, the tease, and all that. It just seemed like you wanted to make a hell of my life..."

"I just wanted to get your attention, even if that ended with you hating me. It was always better than being ignored. And I guess I was jealous too. You have everything I've ever wanted. Friends. Gratitude," he pauses, "Love... I'm so despicable I've never had any friends..."

"What about Crabbe and Goyle?"

"You bet, they only knock about with me because they fear me. They don't like me, and I don't like them either. I don't trust them. I've never confided in them. Anyway, it had cost me a lot to come to you and ask you to be my friend. And I felt so humiliated, so rejected... so hurt, that I wanted revenge... I know, this is stupid... "

There's a long silence.

"Do you still want me dead?" I finally ask.

"Don't be ridiculous, Harry," he says softly as he plays with the snake pendant on my chest, "I thought you would have understood by now that I wanted to bury the hatchet."

My name in his mouth is as sweet as the sound of rain. I can't help but smile.

"What?" He asks, incredulously.

"You've just called me Harry."

"Have I?"

"That's the first time you call me by my first name..."

"I can stick to Potter if you like it better!" He smirks.

"No! I mean... No... Say it again..."

"Wha? Why?"

"Say it again!"

"Err... Harry..."

My smile widens.

Without thinking, I trace the shadows of his eyelashes falling onto his flushed cheeks with my fingers. He breathes heavily as I brush them against his cheeks. Against his lips.

He opens his mouth to say something, but before he can speak and say anything that would make me hesitate, I capture his lips in a slow and gentle kiss. His lips are warm against mine, and he tastes of pumpkin juice. And a little of rainwater and grass.

I feel him slowly relax in my arms, and when his lips part a little, I push my tongue in between them, drawing a breathless sigh out of him, and my brain completely shuts off. I forget the years of rivalry. The insults. And the tease. It's just him. And me. Under the tree. Under the rain. And I've never felt so fucking good in my whole life.

When we finally part away, I stare at his deep blue eyes with apprehension, nearly expecting to see disgust and regrets, and a silent reproach in them, but what I see just makes my heart melt.

"Maybe we could go back inside..." he whispers.

I nod and he helps me back on my feet. I blush when I realise he doesn't release my hand, but keeps it firmly in his, leading me back to the cottage.

The first thing we notice when we step inside is three packets on the table.

"Looks like I'm not the only one who remembered your birthday..." He sneers. "Merlin, that means Dumbledore was there... Do you think he saw us?"

"I don't know..." I mumble.

I actually think he did, otherwise he would have come and say hello. I guess. He releases my hand and walks toward the table.

"There's one from Weasley, one from Granger..." he says, reading the gift tags, "And the biggest one's from Dumbledore."

He holds out his arm to the huge packet and I suddenly remember Dumbledore's recommendations. _Don't touch any suspicious object. Voldemort will try anything to find the two of you, and if he succeeds and breaks the protective charms, he may use some insidious trick to trap you. _And I also remember Draco's Dark Mark burning a bit earlier.

"Draco, don't!" I shout.

Too late. When his hand reaches the packet, he disappears in a whirl.

A portkey.

I stare in horror at the place he was standing a few seconds ago.

"Dracooooooooo!"

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><p><em><strong>Thanks for reading, and many thanks for the fav', the alerts and the encouraging reviews! <strong>__**They mean a lot to me! :) **_

_(and to "kain", you have to be registered if you want to subscribe to story alert, :) ) _

**Published on August.28 2011**


	5. Chapter 5

_**Plot:**__ When Draco's parents are killed by Voldemort, Dumbledore sends both him and Harry to a secret place, to keep them safe from the Dark Lord. What happens when Harry discovers the blonde's darkest secret? Slash. Drarry. Harry's POV. Hurt Draco/Protective Harry. _

_**Please keep in mind that I'm French, hence the English mistakes**__! ;) _

* * *

><p><strong>CHAPTER 5.<strong>

"Harry, don't!"

A wrinkled hand grabs my wrist, preventing me from touching the fake presents. From following Draco, wherever he's been sent to.

I startle and turn around.

Dumbledore. And Snape. I hadn't even heard them apparate.

"The presents... They're fake... Portkeys... Draco... He touched them... Death Eaters..." I mumble, so shocked I'm unable to form a coherent sentence, much to Snape's visible annoyance.

"That's why we're here, Harry," Dumbledore says. "We came as fast as we could once I realised the protective charms I had cast had been broken. I don't know how Voldemort managed to find you, but I'm sorry he did, I really am. You're going to apparate side along with me back to Hogwarts while Professor Snape will go and look for Draco."

I glance at the dark figure next to the old Headmaster, and clench my fists.

"Let me come with you!" Our eyes lock but Snape doesn't move an inch. "Please..." I beg him.

"I don't think you've been invited to the party, Potter. Unlike me." He sneers, showing me the Dark Mark burning black on his forearm. "And I thought you and Mr Malfoy weren't exactly friends, so what's with this sudden impulse of sympathy?"

"I just don't want him dead!" I shout. "And..." I pause and hold back the tears. "The presents were for me... That trap was set for me... It was supposed to be me... Not him... I'll go with you!"

"Well, I appreciate your blind Gryffindor bravery, Potter, but coming along with me would be digging your own grave. Not that I care for your life, but others do," he adds, looking at Dumbledore.

I look at the old man too, hoping to see some sign of approval and understanding in his eternally malicious eyes, but they are empty.

"Professor Snape is right, Harry. That would be completely foolhardy."

Anger is boiling up inside me. I don't care what's right or wrong, wise or foolhardy, all I want is to find Draco and bring him back with me. I've made a promise...

"But Snape used to be one of them! I don't fucking trust the man!" I yell.

Snape gives me a look of utter disgust and for a short instant, I almost see indignation behind his pale expressionless mask.

"Language, Potter," he spits. "You're lucky enough the term hasn't started yet, your insolence would have already cost your house a couple of points."

"Harry," Dumbledore speaks gently but his eyes are now full of reproach and suddenly, I hate him nearly as much as I hate Snape, "you should be more respectful to Professor Snape. He has more than paid for his past mistakes and he constantly puts himself in mortal danger to spy for us. I would trust him with my life, and you should do the same."

"How touching, Albus," Snape says ironically, "But I think we've lost enough precious time that might be crucial for Mr Malfoy..."

"You're right, Severus. I count on you," Dumbledore says.

A grim expression on his face, Snape nods and disapparates.

"You don't understand," I tell Dumbledore, "it's all my fault... I should have been more careful... You'd warned me about suspicious objects and yet..." I can't even finish my sentence as I imagine Draco under the worst tortures again.

Dumbledore wears a patient, concerned look and I'd rather he scold me.

"Harry... It is nobody's fault... If there was someone to blame, then it would be me for I shouldn't have let the both of you alone..."

"But I should have told him I had dreamt about Voldemort!" I protest.

Dumbledore raises an eyebrow at that name. I can see apprehension enter his expression but he hides it just as quickly.

There's a long silence during which I stare blankly out the window. At the old oak tree. A witness to an old rivalry slowly fading away to give way to deeper feelings.

"I know what they did to him... I saw his scars... What if they don't let him go away this time?" I finally ask in a shaking voice.

"Draco is going to be alright, Harry."

His voice is uncharacteristically grave, and I'm not convinced at all.

With a wave of his wand, he summons my bag, and Draco's as well.

"Now, if you please, Harry..." he says, holding out his hand.

I take a deep breath and with one last look around, I take his hand...

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><p><strong><em>Thanks for reading and for your kind and encouraging reviews!<em> :)**

**Published on September.5 2011**


	6. Chapter 6

_**Plot:**__ When Draco's parents are killed by Voldemort, Dumbledore sends both him and Harry to a secret place, to keep them safe from the Dark Lord. What happens when Harry discovers the blonde's darkest secret? Slash. Drarry. Harry's POV. Hurt Draco/Protective Harry. _

_**Please keep in mind that I'm French, hence the English mistakes**__! ;) _

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><p><strong>CHAPTER 6.<strong>

How on Earth could Dumbledore possibly think I would quietly wait on my own in Gryffindor's common room while Draco is out there in mortal danger?

I don't know how long I have been hiding under the Invisibility Cloak in the entrance hall, staring absently at the huge oak doors but each minute looks like an eternity. I am not thirsty. I am not hungry. I don't feel anything but that knot in my stomach. That fear of losing the only person whom I can really be myself with. Who would have believed that I would say that of Draco Malfoy one day? Certainly not myself. And yet...

The doors finally open with a loud crack to reveal a dark figure. Snape. Holding Draco in his arms.

Draco...

He looks like a dislocated puppet in Snape's arms. His eyes are closed, his face is covered in bruises and cuts and his pale green shirt is torn and soaked with blood. His blood. My heart skips a beat. I'm so stunned I don't even hear Dumbledore coming.

"Severus... Is he alive?" He asks the question that my lips were forming silently.

Snape nods and I should feel relieved, but the utterly grim expression fixed on his face makes me gather that 'alive' might be all Draco is. I follow them to the hospital wing, horrified by the red drops that dribble along the way onto the marble floor. My thirst for revenge grows stronger with each one of them.

"Should I call Poppy?" Dumbledore asks as Snape carefully lays Draco on a bed and unbuttons his shirt. From this distance, in this light, I can only imagine how badly he's been hurt, and I grit my teeth, trying to chase away the visions of torture that cross my mind. Snape shakes his head.

"She would be of no help, I've already made him drink a painkiller potion," he says, and he begins to trace his wand over Draco's wounds, muttering inaudible incantations.

"The poor boy has lost a lot of blood," Dumbledore states as he pushes a blond lock away from Draco's eyes.

Snape looks up and gives him a stern look.

"The torture has indeed been worse than the previous times and there was no way I could ask to put an end to this without sounding suspicious, but it's not what I would worry about…"

"What do you mean, Severus?"

"The boy's got the sword of Damocles above his head. The only reason he is still alive is that he's made a deal with the Dark Lord. A deal I really doubt he'll be able to honour."

The Headmaster looks intently at Snape and there's something in his eyes that tells me he has understood what Snape is on about. I haven't and it annoys me a lot. Not as much as it worries me, though.

"Is there anything else we can do for him right now?" Dumbledore asks gravely.

"There is not much left to do. He just needs to rest. With the painkiller potion and the healing spells, he should recover soon. It's about his soul I am worried about. He's been through too much lately, and he carries a heavy burden, I know what I'm talking about..." Snape sneers, rolling up Draco's sleeve to reveal his dark mark.

"I trust you to keep an eye on the boy, Severus."

"Why does this sound surprisingly familiar to me?" Snape asks with disdain and I'm not sure I understand the sarcasm there.

"Harry..." Draco suddenly mumbles in his sleep, interrupting them.

My heart lurches. They shouldn't hear my first name on his lips. Snape raises an eyebrow and gives Dumbledore an inquisitive look.

"Well, those two have just spent a couple of weeks confined to a small place. That necessarily creates bonds."

The old man doesn't know how right he is... Anyway, Snape doesn't look much convinced. That is when Dumbledore looks exactly in my direction. I hold my breath.

"You may show yourself now, Harry," he says in a malicious tone, "it looks like someone is calling you... Draco will need your help. More than ever..."

My mouth drops open. Has he known from the beginning that I was there? My cheeks become hot and I slowly take off the cloak, only to find Snape glaring at me.

"Breaking the rules again, Potter? Like father, like..."

"Severus!" Dumbledore cuts him off. "It's only fair Harry worries about Mr Malfoy. I realise now how absurd it was to tell him to wait in Gryffindor's common room. Harry, do you think you could stay by his side and warn us if there's anything wrong? Professor Snape and I need to talk... We'll be in my office, if you ever need our help."

Too happy to get off lightly, I just nod nervously and Snape looks daggers at me. And at Dumbledore.

"Very well... We'll see you later, Harry," Dumbledore offers with a polite smile.

Once they have left the room, I take a seat next to Draco. I can hardly look at him without grimacing in pain and anger. Although the healing curses have helped his wounds to close up, it's still not a pretty sight. His chest is even worse than before. Not a single square inch of skin has been spared. His beautiful porcelain face, which had remained intact until this morning is now covered with cuts, scratches and bruises. His lips, which still tasted of pumpkin juice a few hours ago, are now red, and blue, and swollen. He looks tensed and feverish. I let my fingers brush across his cheek, very carefully for fear of hurting him more, and I lean forward to plant a feather-light kiss on his lips. His features relax and his hand weakly clutches at mine, and I hold it tight, swallowing back the tears that threaten to escape my eyes.

"I'm sorry, Draco. I haven't kept my promise..."

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><p><em><strong>Thanks for your time and for your kind and encouraging reviews!<strong>_** :)**

**Published on December.11 2011**


	7. Chapter 7

_**Plot:**__ When Draco's parents are killed by Voldemort, Dumbledore sends both him and Harry to a secret place, to keep them safe from the Dark Lord. What happens when Harry discovers the blonde's darkest secret? Slash. Drarry. Harry's POV. Hurt Draco/Protective Harry. _

_**Please keep in mind that I'm French, hence the English mistakes**__! ;) _

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><p><strong>CHAPTER 7.<strong>

"Oi, Potter! Wake up, you lazy git!"

I wake up with a start and blink my eyes open. It takes me several seconds to bring my mind back to reality. Hogwarts. Hospital wing. Malfoy. Hurt. Sitting up at his bedside. Three days. Feeling tired. Very tired... How long I have been sleeping, I have no idea but it surely doesn't feel enough. I don't even know what time of the day it is. I push my glasses back onto the bridge of my nose and turn to look at him. The soft light cast hard shadows across his pale face, and despite the bruises and the cuts, which are already healing, he looks beautiful. How come it took me so many years to notice it? Was I that blinded by hatred?

"Draco..." I whisper, swallowing the hard lump in my throat.

"Himself. Merlin, your powers of perception will never cease to amaze me, Potter."

"How you're feeling?" I ask him, ignoring his sarcasm.

"I would have appreciated if you wouldn't have drooled on my chest in your sleep, but apart from that, I guess I'm ok," he smirks. "Unlike you. You look like shit."

Well, I've spent the last three days at his bedside, listening to his breathing, keeping an eye on his temperature, watching out for his every move, worrying about the numerous nightmares he's had, feeling helpless _and_ hardly getting some sleep and food.

"Yeah, well, see your face in the mirror before speaking!" I tease.

"Come on, Potter! You know I'm the gorgeous one! But it's ok, I understand your jealousy. I have that effect on people."

As much as I feel relieved to see his signature smirk back on his face, his behaviour disconcerts me. From what I know, he's been to Hell and back so why is he pretending he's only overslept and that nothing happened?

"Hey, Potter! You look like you've just been French-kissed by a Dementor!"

I hadn't been aware I was staring blankly at him.

"Draco... I... When Snape brought you back to Hogwarts... Well, when I saw you in his arms... all that blood... I thought you were... you know..."

"Devastatingly handsome?"

Here he goes again.

"No, dead, actually," I say gravely.

"You're such a drama queen, Potter! Those were just scratches."

"Scratches that made you lose a hell lot of blood and kept you unconscious for three days despite Snape's cares..."

"Three days?" He whistles. "Not bad. I'll try to break that record next time."

"Drop that mask, Malfoy. I'm not buying any of your _everything is for the best in the best of all possible worlds_ shit."

His smile vanishes and his eyes turn into a grey storm.

"Shut your mouth, Potter!"

"Draco, what have they done to you?" I ask, unruffled.

He shakes his head in exasperation.

"You're impossible, you know that? What do you think they did, for Merlin's sake? It was just the usual stuff."

"That's not what Snape seemed to think. He said the tortures had been much worse than ever, and that the only reason you were still alive was that you'd made a deal with Voldemort."

He freezes like a fox facing the hunter's gun and his face is so pale that it's almost transparent.

"I'm thirsty. I could do with a glass of water, please," he says nervously.

I let out a long sigh and stand up.

"Here you are."

He takes it with a shaking hand, carefully avoiding my eyes.

"Thanks."

I watch him empty his glass in long slow sips and there is something so delicate in the way he drinks that I just can't tear my eyes away from him. Then he puts the empty glass on the bedside table, and neither of us speaks for what feels like an eternity.

"What's that deal?" I suddenly break the silence, asking the question that hasn't left my mind in peace for three days.

He turns his head to look at me, and behind his usually expressionless eyes, I can see deep sadness, and maybe, if l look at them very carefully, a certain fear. He frowns, apparently realising that his eyes were giving himself away and they turn back to the concrete wall they usually are.

"Look Potter, can we skip that chapter? Please?"

I narrow my eyes and there's a bitter taste in my mouth.

"You don't trust me, right?"

"Do you really think I would have told you all about my little Friday night parties if I didn't trust you? Merlin, Potter! I knew you were dumb, but I had clearly underestimated your stupidity," he scoffs.

"Then why don't you tell me about that deal?"

"Why would you care, anyway?"

"And you're the one calling me an idiot? I happen to care about you, Malfoy, like it or not!" I snap.

"Why all of a sudden, you would care about my life when we've known each other for what, six odd years, and you never gave a fuck?"

He's got a point. I never tried to know him during those six years, and I wish I had. But things have changed... Memories of that kiss we exchanged a few days ago come back to my mind. His lips feeling like silk against mine, the warmth of his mouth... I bite my lower lip as if to taste it again.

"I thought it was pretty obvious," I say in an irritated tone. "Or has Voldemort also brainwashed you?"

"I know what you're talking about, Potter. Forget about it, it meant nothing!" He spits. "Surely, you didn't believe there was something going on between us, did you? If so, I'm afraid to disappoint you but I kiss a lot of people, boys and girls, and I enjoy getting them in bed now and then. I have more stalkers than you can think of, and you're just one of them. And being Harry fucking Potter, the Wizarding world's would-be saviour, doesn't make you any special. It doesn't make a bloody difference!"

Anger is boiling inside me.

"And what about that?" I scream, showing him the snake pendant he gave me. "Does that also mean nothing at all?"

There is a slight flush on his cheeks and a tear trickles down his face, shining like a star among the cuts and instantly rubbing my anger away.

"Don't you understand?" he says in a shaking voice, trying his best to swallow back his tears, "it's not safe being around me... Especially for you..."

"Yeah, because it is safe being around _me_? Do I have to remind you that what you went through when you touched those fake presents was supposed to be my birthday party, not yours! It should have been me, Draco! You have no idea how much I blame myself, how guilty I feel! If they had killed you, I... I'd have never forgiven myself! Not to mention I had made you a promise... and I haven't fullfilled it... I'm sorry... so sorry..."

"Quit your melodrama, Potter, I don't need it, really. Anyway, I say it again for that stubborn Gryffindor prat you are, I'm not the sort of person you should associate with." He looks away from me and sighs. "In any kind of way. So just pretend nothing happened."

"I can't! And if you believe that your pathetic warnings will be enough to get rid of me, then sorry to disappoint but you're totally off-base, Malfoy! So you'd better get this into that little pretty head of yours!" I yell, poking him in the chest with my index finger.

"Ouch!" he grimaces in pain.

His wounds. Silly me!

"Sorry! I didn't mean to... I..."

"Hey, it's ok, Potter, I'll survive! But this," he says, pointing to where I've just poked him," is my chest, not my head. I think you need a few anatomy lessons." He grins viciously and dirty thoughts suddenly cross my mind. _God, I shouldn't be thinking of Malfoy that way! What's wrong with me? Am I under some kind of spell? _

"But it's interesting to know you find me pretty, nevertheless," he adds, smirking.

"Wha-? I... No! Whatever!" I feel my cheeks burning.

"Can I ask you a question?"

I raise an eyebrow but I almost feel thankful that I don't have to start on his looks...

"Sure," I nod.

"When you kissed me the other day, was it... out of pity?"

This totally takes me by surprise and I am kinda touched to see him let his guard down and feel that insecure. I come closer to him, and cup his face, carefully avoiding the cuts and bruises. He makes a muffled sound of surprise and I press my mouth very delicately against his lips.

"Harry..." he mutters breathlessly.

"Does that answer your question?" I whisper against his lips and kiss him again, more eagerly this time, deepening the kiss and sliding my tongue into his mouth. Despite what he just told me, it feels like the safest place in this world.

"Yeah, well," he says, pulling back, "I admit that was a stupid question. I mean, I am the epitome of beauty and intelligence, what other reason would you need to kiss me?"

Our laughter echoes in the hospital wing, and for a little while, I forget about everything...

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><p><em><strong>Thanks for reading, and sorry for the fluffy end of this chapter! I hope Draco's not too OOC... <strong>_

_**And thank you for your kind reviews, alerts and fav too! :) **_

_**HAPPY NEW YEAR TO YOU ALL! **_

**Published on January.15 2012**


	8. Chapter 8

_**Plot:**__ When Draco's parents are killed by Voldemort+, Dumbledore sends both him and Harry to a secret place, to keep them safe from the Dark Lord. What happens when Harry discovers the blonde's darkest secret? Slash. Drarry. Harry's POV. Hurt Draco/Protective Harry._

_**Note:**__ Yeah, yeah, I know... I hadn't updated in ages, but I've had a lot of crap going on in my life for several months, so I have massive writer's blocks... _

_**Warning:**__ The story, which was rated T so far, is __**now rated M for language and sexual content**__. Don't say I didn't warn you! ;) Thought Harry's first time was too important to be left out, but if you don't like "explicit scenes", you can stop reading when it's getting hot and wait for the next chapter, you won't miss anything about the plot. ;)_

_**Please keep in mind that I'm French, hence the English mistakes**__! ;) _

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><p><strong>CHAPTER 8.<strong>

"I solemnly swear that I am up to no good," I whisper.

I stare at Draco's spot on the Marauder's map. It doesn't move. What the hell is he doing in the Astronomy Tower? I sigh and tap my wand on the map.

"Mischief managed."

It's been a week since Draco came out of the Hospital Wing and he's been acting like nothing had ever happened to him, which annoys me a great deal. We're once again stuck together as Dumbledore wants us to spend the rest of the summer here at Hogwarts (with pre-term general revisions classes with Snape, oh joy!) and that feels quite weird to have the whole school for us. To Filch's great despair, we are allowed to hang around pretty much everywhere, as long as we don't go outside of the castle.

So we obviously spend a lot of time together. We make small talk, we kiss, we play chess, we read, we tease the portraits, we attend Snape's classes with the same enthusiasm, or we just sit in silence. He often looks deeply sad and he keeps on slipping into my bed without a word at night but he wouldn't talk to me. I'd been itching to ask him questions about what happened last week, but I was secretly hoping he would finally decide to speak. Of course, it never happened. So earlier tonight, I told him that if he really trusted me, he had to tell me everything. I then went to take a late-night bath and when I came back to the Slytherin's common room, he wasn't there anymore.

Ignoring the snoring of the portraits and the clanking and groaning of the Bloody Baron, I walk up to the Astronomy Tower. I have barely cleared the final stair as I spot him, leaning against the railing.

"Hey!" I call, slightly out of breath as I walk towards him.

He turns to face me, apparently not surprised to see me there. The wind blows his white blonde hair in front of his eyes and the moonlight makes his face look even paler than usual. His face has completely healed except for a two inches scar under his left eye. I find it cute but he hates it. Even if I am stricken by his beauty, I notice the tear that twinkles like a diamond on his cheek and that he quickly wipes away.

"Missing me already, Potter?" he says calmly, his signature smirk on his face.

"What are you doing here?" I ask, not caring about his sarcasm.

"What does it look like to you?"

"It looks like you're trying to avoid me because you don't want to talk about what happened to you, and especially about that deal you made."

"Oh please, like I could escape you! With your bloody spy's map, I can't even go to the loo without you noticing, you pervert stalker!" He scoffs. "Anyway, no, I'm not trying to avoid you, I just felt like looking at the stars, no big deal. So don't make such a fuss, okay?"

He is lying of course, but what can I do? If he doesn't want to speak, then he won't, no matter how hard I try. I sigh and he looks back at the sky.

"I've always loved looking at the stars. I hated Sinistra's lessons though, couldn't care less about Jupiter's moons! But when I was a child, I thought that the day I'd learn to fly on a broom, I'd fly so fast and so high that I would catch a star. Well, I only caught golden snitches instead," he adds with a sad smile. "Did you used to look at the stars as well as a kid?"

"It's not like my cupboard had any window, you know," I point out.

"Oh yeah, right, I'd forgotten all about your dramatically sad Oliver Twist-like childhood..." He sneers.

I'm so upset I barely pay attention to the mention of another Muggle book.

"Yeah, well, not everybody had the chance to be raised by loving parents," I spit.

His jaw tenses and he grits his teeth.

"Yeah, tell me about that," he scowls.

"What do you mean?"

"It doesn't matter. Not anymore, at least."

"Come on, speak your mind!"

He rolls his eyes.

"Harry bloody Potter, a Gryffindor in all his glory, stubborn and annoying! I'm so screwed!"

"Exactly! And I won't give up, so you'd better tell me!"

"Well," he says, letting out a long sigh, "growing up with a father who's got such high expectations of his son that he would cast the Cruciatus Curse on you and keep you locked in your bedroom for five days just because you hit a wrong note on the piano during his precious ex-Death Eaters party; and a mother so scared of him that she wouldn't say anything to protect you, isn't exactly what I would call _being raised by loving parents_. And that's just an example."

My mouth drops open and I realize once more that I truly knew nothing about him and that the mask he's been wearing for all those years is even thicker than I thought. We definitely have more in common than I would have ever imagined.

"What? Surprised?" he asks with a fake smile.

"I... I didn't know about that..."

"There are a lot of things you don't know about me, Harry."

"I... I'm sorry... I don't know what to say..." I mumble.

"Then don't say anything. I like you better when you keep your mouth shut anyway, that way I almost forget how stupid you are and only focus on your average looks," he chuckles.

_The bastard!_

"Fuck you, Malfoy!"

He grins and cups my face with his hands.

"Do you know you're really cute when you're angry? That's probably why I've always enjoyed getting you mad... and you get so easily upset." He pauses and stares at me so intently that I have to look away. "It may be dark, but I still can see you blushing, Potter!"

_I hate him!_

"Shut up!"

"_You_ shut up!" he says, grabbing hold of me and savagely pinning me against the railing.

Before I can say anything, he crushes his lips against mine and forces his tongue into my mouth. The kiss is wild, almost violent. He then pulls back and his breath mingles with mine. I would call him all names if I wasn't burning with desire.

"I want you, Harry," he whispers huskily, sending shock waves through my whole body.

Without breaking eye contact, he unbuttons my pyjama jacket and gently licks my nipples. I can't move. I can't breathe. I can hear my heart beat in my ears. He'll soon realise that my cock is hard against the thin fabric of my pyjamas. He makes a trail of light kisses down my bare chest and then slides the wet tip of his tongue into my navel. I shiver and can't help but groan. With a smile, he pulls my pants down to my ankles and starts to caress my dick. He swirls his tongue around its head, licking up the pre-cum, before slipping his mouth over my erection and massaging my balls. I gasp. He slides his mouth along the head and shaft, up and down with speed and skill. It feels warm, and wet, and fucking good.

"Draco, I'm gonna come..." I manage to articulate.

Instead of pulling back, he sucks so deep and hard that I explode into his mouth.

"Fuck," I grunt.

My legs give way and I let myself slip against the railing, trying to catch my breath and to stop my entire body from shivering. He swallows my load and I can't help but blush. Kissing me hungrily and letting me know he wants more, he makes me lay on the cold marble but I'm so hot I barely notice.

"First time ever, huh?" he asks, breaking the kiss.

Indeed. I've never been that intimate with anyone. Groping Cho's boobs is the furthest I've ever gone. As I give him a shy nod, I suddenly hate being so inexperienced and I hate all those who have been in his arms before me. Parkinson, Zabini, some guy from the Bulgarian quidditch team, Michael Corner... or even Katie Bell! How can I be sure I'm not just another notch on his belt?

"Hey, don't look at me like that! I'm not a brute, you know? I won't do anything that would hurt you, Harry. So if you don't want to go further, then just say so and I'll stop."

It feels so weird to hear so much kindness and sincerity in his voice, to think that he really seems to care... I almost forget we once were enemies... I shake my head.

"No! I... don't want you to stop..." I say, feeling my cheeks getting hot.

"Good. Because I want you so bad right now that my balls hurt!" he grins.

I can't help but laugh.

"I knew you were a true romantic deep inside!" I tease nervously.

"You have no idea," he says, a malicious smile crossing his face as he licks his fingers, one by one, in a very suggestive way. There is something so diabolically erotic about him that I could be hard again just from looking at his face.

While kissing my waist gently, he caresses my balls and slowly slides his hand along the crack of my ass. I tense as the tip of his finger touches my asshole and starts massaging its entrance. I don't stop him though, because God! That feels so good that I suddenly can't help thinking that his finger would feel even better up inside me. I relax my butt muscles to let him know it is okay to go ahead, whatever he has in mind. Accepting my 'invitation', Draco shoves a finger inside my ass, knuckle by knuckle, until it is entirely inside me and touches something that makes me gap and tug at his shirt.

"Blimey, Potter! Relax! It's just your G-spot! Like I said before, you really need some anatomy lessons!" he smirks. _(1)_

I am about to yell at him for making fun of me but he shoves another long and delicate finger inside me and starts to thrust hard and fast. The pleasure is so intense I can't even speak. Instead, I lose all control I had left and let out some kind of animal growls I am quite ashamed of. It's like I'm going to come, again and again, but nothing happens and the pleasure becomes so strong I can hardly bear it. I feel like I'm going to collapse. If he goes on, I'll explode. If he stops, I'll die.

Suddenly, he removes his fingers and leaves me panting, wanting for more. I want him. I want to feel him inside me. Right now.

"Please... Draco..." I practically beg.

He leans over me and plants a kiss on my lips.

"You sure that's what you want?" he whispers in my ear.

"Oh, for Merlin's sake, Draco! Just... fuck me!" I can't believe these words have escaped my mouth! "I...errr... Sorry..." I mumble, feeling like I've lost all dignity.

I'm waiting for him to burst out laughing, but instead, he stands up and smiles the most beautiful smile I've ever seen. He then slowly unbuttons his shirt and unbuckles his belt, getting rid of his clothes to reveal his thin but muscular pale ivory body. I can't tear my eyes from him. He is utterly beautiful. I am lost in thoughts when I feel him take my glasses off and everything becomes blurry.

"You don't need them. You don't need to see, you just need to feel..." he explains.

I know why he is doing that. He hates his body. He hates his scars. And he can't stand me staring at him.

"Draco, you don't need to hide. You're absolutely stunning," I tell him as he spreads my legs a little wider and kneels between them.

"Shut up, you're talking nonsense," he grumbles.

Before I can protest, he rams his cock inside me. I clench my teeth but pleasure soon overtakes pain. He thrusts, again and again, harder and faster. I'm on the borderline between pain and ecstasy. I've never felt like this before and I groan with each thrust until I feel his warm juice fill up my ass. He collapses on me, both of us panting and dripping with sweat. I feel his heart beating fast against my own chest, and I instinctively wrap my arms around him and hold him tight.

"Harry..." he simply murmurs.

Without my glasses, I'm unable to distinguish the stars in the dark velvet sky above us, but I surely feel thousands of them shining in my heart right now.

"Draco... I love you... And I want my glasses back so that I can learn by heart every single scar and beauty spot on your body!"

"Potter," he grins. "Just. Shut. Up!"

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><p><em>Please note that even if I've written more than 50 stories, that's the first time ever that I write an explicit sexual scene so I'm sorry if that sucks! (no bad play-on-words intended! Lol) <em>

_(1) That refers to the previous chapter, in which Draco already tells Harry that he needs anatomy lessons. _

_**Thanks for reading and please let me know what you think so that I can improve later. :)**_

**Published on June 10. 2012**


	9. Chapter 9

**Note:** _I'm sorry, I know it's been more than a year since I last updated. What can I say? Well, the crap going on in my life I mentioned when I posted the previous chapter... My husband died in August 2012 after three weeks of intensive care which followed his 10__th__ suicide attempt of the year. Now I am alone with our little boy and I just wasn't able to write anymore. But now I'm back to writing, I wrote a couple of Sherlock BBC fanfics and as I finally had a few fresh ideas for this story, here I am :-) _

_This chapter is rated T _

_**Please keep in mind that I'm French, hence the English mistakes ;) **_

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><p><strong><span>CHAPTER 9<span>.**

"What are you thinking of?" I ask as I leave a trail of light kisses down his neck. His skin smells of coconut and I can't help but smile. It's been our ritual over the past few weeks. Taking a late bath in the prefects bathroom every day. We spend an hour or two in bath, until our fingers get more wrinkled than Dumbledore's, talking, cuddling and I love those moments when time seems to stop.

"Nothing," he mumbles. But even if he's sitting in water with his back at me and that I can't see his face, I can tell something is worrying him. I tighten my arms around his chest.

"You're still upset about Myrtle?"

Yeah, that damn Moaning Myrtle has done it again. She has 'spied' on us. Just when we were doing unspeakable things. This girl is a pervert, I swear! Anyway, I know Draco is really self-conscious. Even in front of the ghost of a girl who died years ago.

"That four-eyed frustrated virgin can sod off."

"What is it, then?"

"I've been thinking about tomorrow. Haven't you?"

Tomorrow. Yes. Start of another term at Hogwarts. Of course, I have been thinking about this too. For the first time, I'm not looking forward to it. At all. Because this has been the best summer of my life since Hagrid burst into the Hut-on-the-Rock in 91. But I was trying not to think about it. I was trying to seize the moment. To make the most of those last privileged moments together.

"Yes, I have," I admit. I feel him tense in my arms.

"And?" he asks, turning around to face me.

"And what?"

"Well, what do you think? What should we do?"

I raise an eyebrow. "What are you driving at?"

"Whether we should tell people or not."

"Of course not!" I exclaim. "I mean... Have you really considered telling them?" He doesn't reply and I take that as a 'yes'. It never occurred to me that he'd plan to tell people about us. I mean, he spent the last few years telling everyone how much he hated me so I never thought he'd be willing to come out and admit his feelings about me. "Draco," I say, slightly embarrassed, "people wouldn't understand."

He forces an awkward smile. "Ah, I saw this coming. And yet, somehow, deep inside, I still wished you wouldn't say that..."

"Ok, so what do you suggest?! That I sit at the Slytherin table tomorrow and that we hold hands and French kiss during the Sorting Hat ceremony?!"

"No, you're right," he says disdainfully. "We're not going to tell anyone. It would tarnish the reputation of the great Harry Potter. The boy who lived. The wizarding world's saviour. In love, not only with a boy, but with the bad guy. Draco Malfoy, a Death Eater! Oh, what a shame it would be, eh, Harry?"

"That's not what I meant..."

"Yes it's what you meant, and you know it." I hate to admit it, but he's right. I don't really care telling people I'm gay, or bi, or whatever, but it's true, if I wouldn't change him if I could, I would definitely change his name. Draco Malfoy. I used to grimace whenever someone mentioned it and I can already picture Hermione looking reprovingly at me and hear Ron telling me I've gone crazy. "Oh, don't worry, Harry. I'm gonna make things easier for you", he takes me out of my torpor and steps out of the bathtub, drops of water shimmering all over his gorgeously naked body. He sounds as cold and full of hatred as his old self was and my first name in his mouth suddenly doesn't seem to be in its proper place. "We're done."

Those words echo in the bathroom and stab my heart. And it hurts. It hurts so much. I'd rather have Umbridge forcing me to use her Blood Quill or even Voldemort fucking with my brain rather than feeling like this.

"What?" I finally manage to articulate, failing to prevent my voice from shaking.

"You heard me."

"But... it can't be... you can't be serious... Whatever happened to all those weeks we've just spent together?"

"Well, it's been great fun, I won't deny it, but now it's time to get back to reality."

As I watch him pull on his pyjamas, I can't even tell if I'm angry or sad. Both, I guess. "You don't mean a word of it!"

"You sure?" he smirks, making his way towards the door.

"Draco, wait! We can tell them, if you want!"

He sneers. "There is nothing to tell, Potter. You'll never accept your feelings in public. Full stop," he tells me as he reaches the door.

"Draco!" I call, also stepping out of the bathtub.

"Don't move!" he yells. "Don't even try to follow me. Don't talk to me anymore. Forget everything."

"I don't want to! Listen, this is stupid. You know it is! Why don't you-"

"Shut your gob, Potter! Or I'm gonna say things you're not going to like."

I step back into the hot water but I feel like it's still not as hot as my ears and cheeks right now. "Oh yeah? Like what?"

He lets out a long sigh, "Don't fuck with me, Harry."

Oh, so he's back to Harry, now? Pfft! Maybe there's a hint of sadness in his voice, maybe his face has softened a little, but I'm too mad right now to pay much attention. "Fine. Bugger off! That's better this way anyway!"

I hear the door close behind him and I feel as though an invisible hand has reached into my chest and squeezed my heart. In a split second, my anger flies away and I feel the tears welling up. I don't even try to fight them and soon enough, salted drops mix with coconut scented bubbles.

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><p><em><strong>Thanks for reading! Reviews are always welcome! :) <strong>_

**Published on September.9 2013**


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